going once...going twice...

I don't know if you knew this, but I'm quite a catch. This was no news to me, so in an effort to harness that power, I put myself up for auction to raise money for a worthy cause (The Arthritis Foundation). Yes, indeed, one lucky person would be the recipient of two and a half hours of time with moi! And if that wasn't enough sugar, I also agreed to throw in a home-made pie to sweeten the deal. 

Alright, let me back up a step. I signed up to do the Jingle Bell Run with a team of fellow yelpers, and we decided to try and be the top fund-raising team. People were throwing all kinds of ideas out there--bake sales, karaoke night, etc. Then someone suggested a date auction, and I jumped all over that scheme. At first I offered to do a combination bake-a-cake, then jump-out-of-it prize, but was asked to tone it down. 

The worst part of the experience was having to write a review of myself. How to convey what a catch I am without sounding conceited? It took me several hours (two minutes) late at night (during my lunch break) to perfect this masterpiece. 

Clearly my words of wisdom paid off. Rather than having no one bid on me, as I'd feared, there apparently was a bit of a bidding war going on over Miss FancyPeacock! I ended up being the 'prize' that raked in the most money--$150! If anyone ever told you it doesn't feel good to have a price attached to you, they were LYING! Because as the bids went up, so did my self esteem.

Sad.

There was no live bidding, as my drawing would suggest. Instead this event all took place via the Internets, where those interested would privately place their bid to the man in charge. I have yet to go on this 'date,' but will fill in all the deets after it happens, have no fear! And while it might be too late for YOU to bid on me, feel free to donate to the cause anyway!